7 Reasons to Be Your Own Boss

In 1997 I was travelling in the Memphis area and I sat down at a Chili's in Cordova, TN to have a drink or two.  Sitting at the bar, three sheets to the wind, was a young man about my age (I was 21 at the time) drinking the same top-shelf margaritas I was drinking.  The bartender told me what he did for a living and I inquired as to how he did it.

He got tired of the same old grind and decided it was time to do his own thing.  He talked to people he knew and got referrals and the next thing you know, he's got 2 full-time landscaping crews working the Memphis area.  I was impressed.

Then he told me something that still lingers in my mind to this day. "Just go out and do it," he said with a rising emphasis on the word "do."

So as I was thinking today while driving, it occurred to me that the young landscaper was still correct and I should go out and do it.

I have compiled my top ten reasons to be my own boss.

1.) You call the shots not someone else.

As I get older I have trouble taking orders from someone, especially someone who thinks they know what they are doing.  More often than not I hear stories of incompetent managers who are more concerned with being in charge instead of leading those in their employ.

2.) The money you make is making you richer and not someone else.

The people at the very top of their businesses have their hopes, goals, and dreams lined up in front of them and they WILL leverage their people to achieve them.

3.) Serious tax advantages.

Always consult a professional but there are a lot of things that can save you money on your taxes.

4.) You get to choose the people you work with.

Getting along with your people is a very important part of your work so why not surround yourself with people who support you and that you have chemistry with.

5.) You can follow your passion.

As an expert doing your own thing, you can share your passion and inspire others.  If you're doing what you love then it won't feel like work.

6.) You get to be a real leader and connect with people.

Everybody is going to look to you for guidance and you get to lead them. Not only that you can use your position to inspire people to become better.

7.) You get things done - FASTER.

Entrepreneurs do not like red tape as a whole and you can as a business owner bypass a lot of the red tape that many other businesses use to increase your output and get a desired result faster.

If you're reading this there is one more thing I have to tell you.  Just go out and do it.

What Happens In Bama Makes You Want To Move To Texas

Boss: I'm so glad I have a driver like you.

Me: Thanks, Boss. What made you say that?

Boss: You don't screw things up.

Me: Isn't that what we're SUPPOSED to do.

Boss: You know how drivers are...

Me: I don't know but tell me, please.

Boss: [SILENT]

Me: Boss, have you considered what it would be like if I wasn't around?

Boss: Oh, come on!!! You'll never leave here.

Me: We'll see about that. [WINK]

   This was a conversation I had with my boss in 2013.  By this point I had spent almost 3 years with a local outfit in Huntsville, AL.  I wasn't just driving.  I was spending one day a week in the office helping with regulatory and office-related functions such as truck maintenance records, driver daily logs, recovering load paperwork and training.  The Big Fuzzy Roadman was the go-to guy for all your latest trucking and fuel hauling knowledge.  This was as lovely as watching a funeral procession slowly pass through town.

Friend: Hey! What's up?

Me: Not much. You?

Friend: I was wondering if you could help me out?

Me: [ROLLS EYES] How much is this going to cost me?

   This conversation usually happened when a broke friend needed money. One in particular made it look like I was his personal ATM until I cut him off.  Nobody ever seemed to have the means to pay their bills much less pay me back. Often times I would 'gift' them the money. I knew many of them couldn't pay me back.  The most disappointing thing was their lack of effort.

Female: My boyfriend treats me like crap.

Me: We've had this conversation before.  If it's that bad why don't you leave him?

Female: I don't know.  I love him and all but every time I think he has to go I think that I am going to be lonely and my kids will miss him and my bed will be empty and I can't pay my own bills without him.

Me: I guess you love him enough for him to pull his crap on you.

     This was a normal conversation with female friends.  What makes it worse is that most of these women wouldn't know a good guy if they met one.  Nice guys weren't a wanted commodity.  They were talked about like they were but the buttholes always made their way to first place.  I was used to this.  Maybe it was time to look for another pool of available, intelligent women wanting to actually be in a real relationship with a real man willing to treat them like a lady.  It wore on me to see codependent women keep on being codependent.  They must have liked it, I guess.

Engineer: Hey there, Mr. Gas Hauler!  How does it feel to drive around a bomb?

Me: I noticed you work for NASA.  How does it feel to work for a government department that is having funding cut?  Too bad the current administration doesn't support you dream of being an astronaut.

   Engineers always seemed to have the upper hand in North Alabama.  Huntsville has the most PhD's per capita that any other major city in Alabama. They made more money and changed the face of the city. For as much as they broadened the city's demographic, they often looked down on others as if they were royalty.  It makes me glad I dropped out of school and didn't become one myself.

Family Member: Hey!!! Long time no see!

Me: I cant remember when I last saw you.

Family:  Well, if you'd stick around longer people might actually get to know you.  Heck, if you'd come to church and watch a football game with us we'd like you more.  Too bad you prefer to ride the highways like a gypsy.

Me: Well, I'm too busy living my own life to let anyone else own it.

     The problem with many of my extended family members is that they were way too self-absorbed for my liking.  If you didn't like the same things as they did or go to the same church then you didn't fit in. No matter how hard I tried I couldn't follow conversations on family gossip.  They let their imaginations run wild when I left out details of my life such as the real reason I became a truck driver, making money and taking care of a home.

Alabama Football Fan: Hey! ROLL TIDE!!!

Me: [SIGHS IN DISGUST]

     I know how many Bama Football fans there are.  They are everywhere.  They were their colors, crimson and white.  They shout their war call, ROLL TIDE!  They are arrogant. They are disgusting.  And they worship a dead football coach.  As many of them are awaiting the second coming of Jesus, they also await the day, during the Iron Bowl, that the great Paul W. 'Bear' Bryant will descend from heaven and take over coaching duties as only he could.  Bama fans everywhere will kneel as the Bear will charge one more time to defeat Auburn and put them down never to be seen again.

     I know that some you still live in Sweet Home Alabama and I do miss some things but I no longer experience the same nonsense that brings me down anymore.  To my Bama friends, best of luck.

The Hardest Part of Living With Someone

Dad died in 2009.  If you knew him you'd never forget him.  He had no problem meeting a stranger and no one would stay a stranger for long.  He flirted with the ladies, much to Mom's disdain.  Dad left a positive impression on everyone he met.  He worked hard and played even harder.  Dad once said he wanted to retire to a place where beautiful women were waiting on him hand and foot all the time.  You got to hand it to him, there were some beautiful nurses in the nursing home where he spent the last three years of his life.

Mom died in 2013. She spent much of her time isolated and never went out much as my little brother and I were growing up.  She couldn't drive and hated public transportation.  Her biggest ambition in life was to get a disability check. She hardly had any friends and of those friends, she had she milked those friendships to death and ultimately ran all of her friends off.  Her last three years on this planet were in what she called a hellhole, a nursing home in Lexington, TN, where the staff went out of their way to treat her like a human being instead of another patient waiting to die in those halls.

Comparatively speaking Dad and Mom were like oil and water.  As I grew older I failed to see what he saw in her.  Mom was very, very demanding.  Even though Dad drove for a living he also drove as Mom's personal chauffeur. Mom couldn't do anything on her own and always cited Dad as the reason she couldn't.  Dad, on the other hand, never questioned anything and always faithfully executed his duties without fail, that is until he could not drive anymore.

Dad never complained though.  Mom complained all the time.

Once I was talking with Dad while he was in the nursing home.  He started to look better.  Mom noticed and asked me if I would have a word with him about going home because, of course, she sure did miss having him around.

As I approached Dad with this a stern look of disgust landed on his face as he told me emphatically, 'No! I don't want to go home!'  

'Ok, Pop. I can respect that but can you tell me why?'

'Your momma will drive me crazy!'

So the truth comes out.  Dad not only get his beautiful women but he also managed his escape from his crazy life with Mom.  

Way to go, Dad!

By the way, I still miss you.

Howard Berryman, Sr. 1936-2009

No Rest For The Self Inflicted

     It is commonly understood that if you are tired then you should sleep. Yet even from a young we constantly fight the urge to stop, lay down, rest, then fall into actual sleep. Mother's across America will tell you, "He/she didn't have their nap today and they woke up at 4 o'clock in the morning, they're just tired. That's why they look miserable and are crying on and off uncontrollably," as you look at the mother who wants to act the same way her child is from her own sleep loss.
     Then you have the hard working adult who 'just wants one more minute' they tell themselves, for those few extra miles, for that last finishing touch on a craft project, for that last part of a TV program, for whatever those last few moments are for to stop us from letting go and getting the much needed rest.
     Many truck drivers have been know to drive illegally for 20 hours straight, this means that they are willing to ignore the laws that protect their sleep and safety. The same can be said for crafters and mothers a like who are finishing Christmas pageant costumes, cupcakes for a class bake sale, and any general illness that claims to only last for '24 hours' per family member. These are some of the simple things that we do or can't avoid to post pone sleep for the self inflicted.
     We live in a culture that is so sleep deprived with Starbucks, Dunkin Donuts, and Seven 11's that real rest is no longer valued. It's really hard to give a damn when you are too tired to smell the roses, and coffee really can burn out your taste buds so a steak will never taste the same again. What else are you willing to miss out on because so many pieces of yourself are too tired to enjoy them from your self inflicted lack of rest?
     We have become a culture of sleep apnea and obsession with instant gratification and ignoring our personal needs. Ever make a list of all the things you are too tired to do? This does not include joining a gym, going for daily walks, or eating healthier. This means doing things with other people, going places to be with other humans, and screwing your better half every night. They say that the evidence is in the details, and screwing is such an interesting detail to have in your life. Now get back on your treadmill, you need just one more minute on that computer, just one more minute with your hot glue gun, just one more minute......Zzzzzzzz

Go Big or Go Home

 

     There are days when I need to be reminded of who I really am, almost like a self pep talk into feeling a foundation under my feet and washing my spirit with that memorable hope that has been erased by the distractions of life. My job is very demanding, like anyone else I love it because they treat me well, but there are days when I put my head down and launch into a memorized cycle of no return. It is when my heart is stuck in a place of not finding it's happiness, while my head and body are out making money to please my boss. In this instance my heart is not my boss, instead it is a guy I will call Phil, my soul is a comma patient, and brain is on a mission for Fair Trade Propane.

   This is not a rant or rave against Fair Trade Propane or Phil, like I said I appreciate my job because they treat me so well and I show them my gratitude regularly. However, like any other hard working American who works at least ten hours or more a day every day, there is a tendency to forget that once upon a time you had goals and dreams that were not work related. You forget about wanting to have hobbies, you forget about being interested in other subjects that will let you learn about non-job related things, you forget about what you were and who you really are.

   After meeting my red head and starting to have something similar to a social life, her response to so many things was 'go big or go home'. At first it was funny, at the Chinese Buffet I was challenged to get that 5th plate of food, her response to this dilemma was 'go big or go home' so I got the extra plate. Then as we started to talk about business plans, the stock market, marketing strategies, and ideas that would take a lot of long term planning and extra hours at home that my job does not allow for; her response was 'go big or go home'. This was a challenge that I was really starting to take to heart. 

   What was something I felt big about and wasn't all talk and no action. My job would not always be this busy, I would be able to slow down in three more months if I was hopeful and patient. But what things was I willing to call my own again that I was willing to fight for and keep in my life? What things did I feel that I should go big with or leave at home for a future review. I know that I am your friendly neighborhood propane delivery man, but what else am I? I needed to know that my beer gut was not the only big thing in my life that would stick around for a while that was serious part of me, there had to be more to me than a smile and a beer gut. 

   Then the red head explained to me why she always used the slogan that she did, "Well a long time ago it made sense that 'going big' meant showing love to world in ways it did not understand. Or being the bigger person was not a size thing but a 'not make the world a worse place' thing. So when she used her usual expression, she simply meant that by 'going big' you improve the world and don't let hurt you or itself. What she meant by 'or go home', this is when you recharge your batteries to fight another day and the devil can't win. 

   "Those with the biggest hearts always go big because they don't limit their capacity to love....then you get a different version of the energizer bunny," then the red head told me that size of my heart was one of the reasons she knows that she can emotionally connect with me, I am a fixer-upper, but I am her fixer-upper and that we really need to go home because she can't eat any more at the Chinese Buffet. Her pants don't fit any more so it is time to leave. I quickly find myself again and ask for the check....since I know what dessert is.

Don't Paint Your Propane Tank Brown

I really don't know if people know anything about propane at all. Some people honestly don't like the fact that they have a big bulky tank in their yard that has to be filled every year with money they claim to not have. They consider driving the truck into their driveway actually becomes an 'intrusion' to their privacy and I become the outsider trespassing on their property long enough to fill their tank, collect payment and leave tracks in their yard. (Side note: I don't like to leave the concrete if I can at all avoid it.) 

I do run into those however who want to paint a tank a color to match the house they live in.  If it's white, aluminum or other heat-reflective color this is not a problem.  But imagine a tank painted brown, dark brown to color coordinate with the walls and trim on your single-wide, 16' X 80' trailer. It can be a very confusing task to try and explain the scientific reasons why I cannot legally fill their tank because it is the wrong color. This is not like the popular TV show What Not To Wear and the poor person keeps mixing plaids with stripes, this is about the fact that darker colors make the tank hotter thus making the liquid propane expand in large quantities so the additional heat can make it explode. Nature is not always kind, and it is a community service to correct this misconception if they want their tank to last a few more years of which are also not cheap.

The most volatile characteristic of liquid propane is how it reacts to temperature.  At 0° F outside temperature liquid propane will not expand much in a tank at all and will have hardly any vapor pressure.  However, at 117° F, which is known to happen in Texas, a fully filled propane tank (at about 80 % of  listed water capacity of the tank)  with a working pressure of 250 psi has a very serious chance of spewing gas through the relief valve like Old Faithful.  Darker colors retain heat, this is why heat-reflective colors are required for the outside surface area of the of a propane storage tank. Even Cliff and Stacy would agree that lighter colors in the summer time would totally lower the sweat factor, and the psi pressure in your tank.

When a tank spews forth like a raging geyser it then becomes a liability and costs hundreds of dollars to fix. Also prompting calls to the fire department and other authorities who will in turn ask the question as to why their propane tank was painted brown. Evacuation of the area might even be mandatory costing people valuable time away from their homes. Once a relief valve pops off, then the tank can no longer be used in the storage of liquid propane until this valve is replaced, costing unnecessary dollars and down time.  We certainly want to help protect our friends and neighbors safe by being able to keep the water heaters and ovens going. Everybody wants hot food and showers, so is it worth the cost to paint your propane tank brown? Vanity cannot afford this cost.